“My husband and I have been married for 21 years, we have three kiddos here on Earth and one waiting for us in heaven. We have struggled with unexplained infertility, then been blessed with surprise pregnancies, including having twins 10 years ago. Our kiddos are Olivia,14, and Ace & Quinn, 10. We have always had a desire to adopt and prayed that it would be a part of our story.
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About five years ago, Jason and I were discussing adoption and he brought up the idea of adopting a child with Down Syndrome. I immediately said no. I had two reasons for saying no, but one of them came to me as a whisper and one came as a scream. Selfishly, I have always looked forward to the empty nest days. My husband is my best friend and I look forward to watching our kids grow up and get married and have families of their own. And I incorrectly assumed that having a child with Down Syndrome meant that would never happen. But that argument only whispered to me. I knew that if I felt God calling us to this, I could overcome selfishness. The bigger problem was the voice that was screaming in my ear that I could never be a successful and loving parent of a child with special needs. Most days I felt like I barely had the patience to handle my three typically functioning kids. That hateful voice was enough to push Down Syndrome adoption to the back of my mind.
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Well, over the course of five years, God wrote a different story. He placed a little guy with Down Syndrome in the twins’ class at school every year from kindergarten through third grade, who became their best buddy. They would come home every day talking about their friend and how special he was. My son has always asked for a brother, and his request soon turned from just a “brother” to a “brother with Down Syndrome.” I was able to watch the special kind of love both twins had for their friend and it softened my heart in an amazing way. At the same time, God began to speak truth into my life and my heart. The truth that He can equip me to do whatever He calls me to do! I don’t have to be perfect, I can do things in my own way and on my own timeline and still accomplish what He set out for me to do. In fact, that’s how He wants it to be! He created me as a mom who had thoughts of “I can’t do it” so that I could be here today to encourage another mom who thinks the same thing! Not only has he made me willing to walk this road, He has given me a passion and desire to see this adoption happen and welcome a new son to our family. Our family firmly believes that individuals with Down Syndrome are a perfectly designed creation, with perfectly designed gifts to bring to this world, and we can’t wait to meet our little guy.
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As far as our actual adoption walk so far, we are almost done with the home study and ready to move to the next step! We would’ve been done already, but the path has recently changed from domestic adoption to international adoption. We thought we were making the smart choice by choosing an option that made more sense, financially. But as the weeks went on, I could not shake the feeling that we were supposed to adopt from China. Only last week, we decided to give this all to God and say yes to China adoption. Within two days of making this decision, we came across a picture and profile of a little guy that we fell head over heels in love with. We aren’t able to put a lock on his profile until we are done with our home study, but that is the next step! So we are diving into the world of grants and fundraising, with the hope of raising $20,000. It seems impossible, but I know that nothing is impossible when God has called you to something. And we firmly believe that adoption is at the very core of who God is and how He loves us.
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One side note, we actually already have a name for our little guy, whether he ends up being the child we are pursuing now, or whether God takes us down another path. His name is Ezra James. This name was laid on my heart over a year ago and it is the light that I cling to when this road gets rocky. Because it has been very rocky at times. I believe with all my heart that there is a little boy out there who has a divinely appointed name and is about to turn our world upside down in the very best way.”